HIPPYISM

I greatly enjoy being a liberal hippy, not because I actually choose to label myself like so, but because being called such means I am considered essentially the furthest thing from an overly religious, war mongering, environmentally apathetic republican. Though I don't agree that I should label myself as such, I certainly take being called a hippy as a compliment. After all, most "hippies" I know are extremely pleasant, respectable people. Consider all the hippyish things about me: I love nature, I am a vegetarian, I adore animals more than humans, I am all for progress, change, and revolution, I go around barefoot most of the time, I live in one of the most liberal regions in America, I am not patriotic, I do not love my country, I would never join the military, I think war is senseless, I detest George W. Bush, I dress in earth colours most of the time, I don't care much for dressing up or wearing clothes at all, for that matter, I totally subscribe to this weird new age philosophy that the bible is a crock of lies and that God is a metaphysical super-weapon created by man to control the masses by exploiting instinctual fear of the unknown via authoritarianism, and that my behaviour is guided by an inner animal, I entrench myself in a cult interest entitled "furry," I deeply care about the environment, I sign environmental protection petitions, I donate to animal rights organizations, I cherish happiness over work and school, I would prefer to live poor and joyously rather than rich and unhappy, I play video games starring anthropomorphic animals in beautiful worlds rather than ultra-realistic war simulators, I let my hair grow out for over two years before I finally got tired of it, I shave maybe once every four to five days, I have one heck of a vivid imagination, abortion sounds like a wonderful plan to me, and I don't think communism is all that bad.

I am such an insane hippy. Actually, I believe I am one of the sanest people I know. Of course, even the most insane can be entirely convinced that they're sane. I honestly think I am sane for desiring to snuggle up against a tree and watch a magnificent sunset while hugging a raccoon in my lap and eating a healthy salad and listening to Bob Marley while the world around me is serene and at peace and feeling irie. But, you tell me. Please, though, don't ever think you'll be doing anything but complimenting me by calling me a damn hippy.