Sep 23, 2005

All over the place.

Today's fifty minutes spent in stats lecture reminded me exactly why women in general irk me so much. I'm referring to the ones that go well out of their way to look all pretty by the standards of popular culture, with their hundreds of dollars worth of make-up, expensive skimpy articles of clothing, and 'perfect' hair. It's not so much the way they look, though, that gets under my skin, as I don't have to look at them, even though everything about them screams, "look at me, guys, like omg!!" Rather, it's the way they behave. There is something about a pouty female voice that deliberately expresses a sort of socially expected helplessness that I find positively obnoxious. It's as if they expect a man to rush to their aid as quickly as possible because, well, girls are supposed to act all helpless and guys are supposed to help them! This sociological 'damsel in distress' behaviour is something I witness all too often.

Then there's the way so many of them talk. "Like, oh my gawwwwwd, that homework from research methods was like, so hard, I swear to gawd, I spent like three hours on it last night!" I overheard a girl say that just before the lecture started, and it made me want to lean over the computers and slap her. Why does the vast majority of people around school who have loud and obnoxious voices happen to be females? There's nothing like a high-pitched, totally exaggerated-sounding comment a girl makes when she passes a friend in the hallway that she hasn't seen since, like, yesterday! Meanwhile, all most guys do is shake hands and say "sup." Yeah, that's probably a major reason I am much more tolerant of males. Their behaviours are generally much less overt and seem much more natural and less exaggerated. Guys in general just seem more natural; certainly a favourable characteristic.

So many women just seem entirely artificial to me, whether it's true or not. It all starts with them covering their faces with chemical products everyday to hide their "flaws," and only goes downhill from there. They seem so self-conscious and vain. The ones that wear little hot pink baby t's that say things like "100% hottie" certainly have no trepidation about announcing how snugly they fit into that category. I find girls like these to be the absolute antithesis of attractive. They are utterly repulsive.

Back to my stats class, there is an entire clique of five or six biology "chicks" who almost perfectly match all observable aspects of my description. They all know each other sooooo well, and they always put the entire back row on reserve for each member of their clique. "Sorry, I'm saving that seat for Sarah!" I feel like I stepped into a time machine and warped back to a sixth grade pep rally. Of course, they hardly make an effort to validate their presence in the classroom at all. Whenever I glance over at their monitor displays, I see they're usually chatting with or e-mailing their hot b/f's and even more frequently, shopping for shoes or skimpy clothes. No, I am not exaggering one bit. It's that bad. I hope they all flunk.

It's all these women who operate under very real and evident stereotypes that make me that much more grateful for all the females who don't. I cannot say I abhor the female gender; far from it. It's just that so many members of it give it a bad name, and of course the same is true for males, and humanity in general.

Also, I believe it's time to confess something. Though they are far from my favourite species, I don't really hate humanity. I realise that to say such a thing is the mark of an immature mind, and I have been starting to wise up a little. I do feel a certain amount of compassion even for people who aren't my friends or whom I have some reason to respect and admire (though certainly not everyone, believe me). I actually came to this realisation about a week ago, when I was walking along the shore at the ice ponds south of town. I was minding my own business when I heard a voice say, "help?" At first, I thought I was hearing things. It soon repeated itself, though. I backtracked a few metres and looked down at an elderly man laying in a crack in the lava, clearly disoriented. He had a few bloody scrapes on him from the sharp lava rock, and I determined he must have slipped on the slick surface and gone down hard.

Now, if I truly didn't care, I would have just ignored him and kept on strollin' in the rain to let someone else deal with him. The thought didn't even cross my mind, though. I started talking to him to find out what happened and whether he was seriously injured. It turned out the scrapes were the worst injuries he had sustained, fortunately. Also fortunate was the fact that two fishermen named Jake and Lester happened to walk by a few moments after I found him, and all three of us made a team effort to pull him out of the crack and sit him up. Jake called the EMS and had a medical team sent to the parking lot before the rainforest access trail, and I went back to guide them to the exact spot. The professionals took it from there, helping him back to his condo. It was surprisingly satisfying to know that I had the right thing. It's not very often that I am given the opportunity to help someone in such fashion, and it's odd that I just happened to be down there at that point in time. It was a pretty enlightening experience.

Oh, but I am growing quite weary of hearing about "humans and the animals." Humans are animals, whether one chooses to accept it or not. They are just more evolved, capable of a much wider range of activities and behaviours, and possessive of a greater amount of strengths and weaknesses. In my opinion, this does not make them superior. They are still mere mortals fighting against all odds for survival, only many of them live much more comfortably. And you know, dreaming up a god who just happens to rank humans as the highest-ranking organism isn't exactly a quality I admire a whole lot. Other animals are beautiful for their simplicity, simply for being all that they are: gorgeous, graceful, furry, a reminder of what is genuine and true. They do not pretend, they just are. They act according to nature and instinct, and do not concern themselves with all the ridiculous games humans play. That is what makes them beautiful. They are also wonderful for the joy they bring into people's hearts, by being loyal to them as part of a family or simply posing for a camera in a national park.

This reminds me of one of my favourite George Carlin quotes:

"We're so self-important. So self-important. Everybody's going to save something now. "Save the trees, save the bees, save the whales, save those snails." And the greatest arrogance of all: save the planet. What? Are these fucking people kidding me? Save the planet, we don't even know how to take care of ourselves yet. We haven't learned how to care for one another, we're gonna save the fucking planet? ..."

The same goes for "let's protect this" and "let's protect that." You know, we always have to be in control of nature, what lives and what dies. "Let's eradicate those evil coqui frogs! They're taking over and eating all the insects native birds eat! Native birds deserve to live, coqui frogs are pests!" Of course, most people like birds, so insisting that coqui frogs are cutting off the birds' primary source of food is a great sell for getting people involved in the extermination effort. Realistically, I have seen very little evidence that this actually occurs. People just can't stand these tiny, pesky creatures making so much noise. "Our neighbourhoods are being overrun by noisy frogs! WE CANNOT HAVE THIS!" **Waves imaginary pitchfork and burning torch in the air**

...Meanwhile, I can't imagine how anyone could consider the music they make anything short of euphonious. You know what's terrific, though? The coqui infestation population in Hilo and Puna is now completely out of control. They can never be anything close to entirely eradicated here. Go frogs, yeah, TOUCHDOWN WOOHOO!!!!11

To shift the topic from first to fourth, I browsed a Sonic the Hedgehog comic book whilst in Borders today, and was utterly appalled by his appearance. Before, I could not have possibly thought he could look much worse than he does in this image:



Today, however, I was proven wrong. He looked even more fruitified in the comic book. He looks as if he was drawn by one of the same artists who did the Dragonball Z series. That's not a good thing, trust me. He could not be the real Sonic, but merely a nerdy anime otaku in a homely-looking Sonic costume he spun together with blue construction paper and a glue stick in special ed art class. Dear Rayg, it's so sad. And look at Tails. What the hell -is- that thing?

I must... get that image... out of my mind...

A much better picture: retro-Sonic

Ah, much better. The moral: don't try to improve something that's already perfect.

Talk about disjointed musings. Sometimes, I can't bring myself to write anything at all; other times, I can barely stop.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

First of all I'm thankful for choosing not to read this entry several days ago whilst in Sydney, when I visited. I noticed it, and I skipped right through because I was in an insipid and dull mood on a whole. If I had read it then, I would haven't appreciated and enjoyed what you wrote as greatly as I do now.

It's all about timing.

Seeing as this entry is a rather lengthy and detailed one, I'll try to keep my reply brief. (Oh, but there's so many good points you have made that I want to comment on! Curse you!) Well, bare with me while I delve into all of this:

I'm referring to the ones that go well out of their way to look all pretty by the standards of popular culture...

I'll admit that I used to wear cosmetics several years ago (about four or five). There was no real reason for doing, I suppose it was for acceptance of some sort. Eventually I began to get tired of the time it took to apply and how it wasn't worth it in the end. I was tired of not being who I was naturually. I was tired of being unable to say, "Don't like me as I am, then too fucking bad."

I never wear make-up or try to perfect my 'image' for anyone, anymore. If people don't like me how I look without the aid of any product, that's their problem, not mine. I too get annoyed with the amount of females who resort to materialistic methods to attract others attention.

Yet on the same hand I don't particularly want them to stop. Let them suffer by attracting people who will only every care for them on a shallow level. I don't mind having more decent, intellectual people surrounding me instead.

The same applies to the little obnoxious acts that they put on, whether it be with actions of vocal tone. Women aren't defenseless and men shouldn't be lured in by pathetic little games played by the female gender. The men who do fall for it only encourage women, sure, but I think it's about time people started saying, "Quit your whining, woman". Half the time they are only using that 'pout' tone because they want something. Fuck them, they hardly deserve what they want.

Then there's the way so many of them talk. "Like, oh my gawwwwwd, that homework from research methods was like, so hard, I swear to gawd, I spent like three hours on it last night!" I overheard a girl say that just before the lecture started, and it made me want to lean over the computers and slap her.

Oh, how I hate those kinds. It's highly amusing for me, as a female, to sit here slandering all these other women, but they are hardly much better than me (yn my opinion, at least). People can take this as conceit, selfish pride or whatever you want but it is far from that. I am not perfect, and I won't claim that, but these women often complain about the most petty and insignificant things. They are the ones who really make a mountain out of an ant hill.

"I spent three hours doing something that was so hard because, well, I didn't have daddy writing my work for me." - Boo fucking hoo, Cinderella; everyone had to study the same thing as you, everyone had to do the same work. Just because you couldn't be bothered actually trying to learn what you should know, and therefore find everything more difficult, doesn't mean you have the right to complain.

I would have slapped her, too.

a girl makes when she passes a friend in the hallway that she hasn't seen since, like, yesterday! Meanwhile, all most guys do is shake hands and say "sup."

I never understood why some of my female friends would just shriek in excitement when they saw me, or come running at me full-speed and tackle hug me. Like you, I typically find myself tolerating men far more than I tolderate me own gender. There's no need to scream about how you painted your nails last night and that Jake didn't call. I merely nod my head slightly as a greeting to people or sometimes give a bit of a smile. Why can't these females do the same? It really isn't that difficult, and if anything, it is far more easier.

I hope they all flunk.

I hope they walk across the road at the wrong time. I mean, I hope they flunk.

My, my, it looks as though I have failed to be brief and I have only addressed about half of your entry. I hope you don't mind how much I seem to have to say. As for the rest of your entry (for the sake of decreasingly my comment length), you make some very valid points. While the female or male gender isn't bad, there are certainly people in both categories that don't help give a 'good impression'. And combined, they both degrade humanity on a whole. And yes, we are animals; I often wonder how anyone can see us as any different.

Every species has its own tools and methods of survival and communication, and they are all animals on this planet. Just because our "tools" and "methods" differ from other animal species doesn't mean we aren't animals like them. If I were a lion and lived by the way lions do naturally, am I allowed to say that I am not an animal, because I wouldn't be doing what "humans" do?

I'm not certain I got my point across exactly the way I would have wanted to, but given how well you always seem to understand me, I think you know exactly what it is that I'm trying to express and get at with this.

And this has grown long enough. I will stop writing here. Thanks for writing something inspiring and entertaining; I always look forward to hearing anything from you.

Timberwolf said...

I'll admit that I used to wear cosmetics several years ago (about four or five). There was no real reason for doing, I suppose it was for acceptance of some sort. Eventually I began to get tired of the time it took to apply and how it wasn't worth it in the end. I was tired of not being who I was naturually. I was tired of being unable to say, "Don't like me as I am, then too fucking bad."

I never wear make-up or try to perfect my 'image' for anyone, anymore. If people don't like me how I look without the aid of any product, that's their problem, not mine. I too get annoyed with the amount of females who resort to materialistic methods to attract others attention.


Way to go! In my view, you seem to represent all that is -good- about the female gender.

Yet on the same hand I don't particularly want them to stop. Let them suffer by attracting people who will only every care for them on a shallow level. I don't mind having more decent, intellectual people surrounding me instead.

Yes, I like how they make it so obvious that they should be avoided at all costs. I would not want -that- to change.

The same applies to the little obnoxious acts that they put on, whether it be with actions of vocal tone. Women aren't defenseless and men shouldn't be lured in by pathetic little games played by the female gender. The men who do fall for it only encourage women, sure, but I think it's about time people started saying, "Quit your whining, woman". Half the time they are only using that 'pout' tone because they want something. Fuck them, they hardly deserve what they want.

This actually reminds me of another thing so many women are characterised by: indirectness and vagueness. You know, when you ask them a simple question and they give you a rhetorical statement or a question of their own. My mother is far from a typical "gurl," but even she does such a thing:

"Hey mom, do you want us to have the car back by the afternoon or the evening?"
"I don't know, what time do you think you'll be back by?"

A straightforward response is something I value highly. Yet, many women I have been around seem to derive some sick pleasure out of making things as complicated as possible- way more complex than they ought to be.

Your comments only inspire me to share more here, and I treasure them greatly. :-*

Anonymous said...

This actually reminds me of another thing so many women are characterised by: indirectness and vagueness. You know, when you ask them a simple question and they give you a rhetorical statement or a question of their own.

A straightforward response is something I value highly. Yet, many women I have been around seem to derive some sick pleasure out of making things as complicated as possible- way more complex than they ought to be.


My grandmother would do such a thing to my grandfather, and he and I would both shake our heads or get annoyed. Often I would find myself lashing out and saying, "Can't you just answer a simple question; why must you make one tiny question so difficult to answer?!"

My mother even does it to me, and I get increasingly annoyed with how difficult it becomes to just get a straight-forward answer. I don't recall myself doing it, but I won't directly say that I definitely don't do it. I believe I don't, because I understand how annoying it is when it happens to me. I do make an effort to answer a question simply though. When I do prose a question as an answer, it is usually to express a point, or encourage the person I'm talking with to think about something.

Your comments only inspire me to share more here...
Oh, please do!