Napoleon Dynamite > Star Wars

Pedro's protection outranks the dark side. Your Jedi training is no match for my Rex Kwon Do skills. Di Qwon would dance on Darth Vader's grave. Uncle Rico could throw a football over them star destroyers. Kip could hack into R2D2's programming and make him explode. Lyle could shoot Chewbacca's fool head off, and Deb could take a sensational photograph of Luke Skywalker being mauled to death by a liger.

I haven't slept since Thursday night. I wonder how this is going to affect my performance on tomorrow's exams?

Exams. ...Exams. I can't help but laugh. Endless, meaningless struggle. A cucumber without a core. Rivulets of obligatory dread. It's time to take advantage of the enlightenment sleep deprivation has afforded me. Giving a shit takes too much effort, so I don't. Defy the despicable engagement. A perpetual bath in boiling blood. A wrinkled soul calving like an arctic glacier. Every step is a journey to the edge of the Earth. Swirling, disconcerting, discombobulating infinitude. Contumeliously cosmic carburetors. why am i capitalizing this ridiculous nonsense? it just presents itself as a bigger, haughtier, more in your face waste of space.

this pup wants his fucking unexistence back, and is off to get euthanized.